Sunday 9 May 2010

Mistaken and slurred

Any mention of the fucking election and you can publicly hit me in the shin. "Eurgh why'd you vote for the Tory's Josh you WANKER" "Because I want to, I agree with them, the vote will actually be worth the paper its printed on unlike everyones favourite bandwagon, SO STOP LOOKING AT ME LIKE I'VE KILLED YOUR KIDS. And I'm gambling on the chance I'll be a millionaire when I'm older. Greedy, yes. Britain back to the Thatcher era, no."

Bunch of twunts.

Hello you averagely beautiful people, you.

You know whats becoming the soundtrack of my life? Not the gentle birds singing in the trees, or the crash of the waves back home in Fleetwood. Its the constant hum of the microwave, I'm beginning to rely on it far to heavily. I'm supposed to be someone who cooks his own food, I used to make spaghetti bolognase and steaks and fajitas 2 months ago, and now, in goes a Rustlers burger, some super noodles, whatevers to hand. I think this country would be a lot slimmer if we banned the microwave, its far to easy and I'm putting on weight because of it.
Quick note, Martini is lovely on its own, I brought a bottle of it back up to Uni and its here next to me, I opened it up just to taste what its like and its very addictive I have to say. Mmmmmmmm...Vermouth.
Oh yeah, Im attempting the £5 challenge this week, I mentioned it in an earlier blog, myself, a man who can easily spend £70 in a week, living off nothing but a fiver for a week, I'll be starting it on Wednesday, after a few drinks with my housemates on Tuesday night. Personally, I think its possible, just not possible for me. And if I do succeed, I'll try and survive the next week on £3. Which really is impossible. The money I would have spent normally, as I have said will be going to SUB. Worthy, worthy cause.
Talking of microwaves, put an egg in and leave it for 2 minutes, its fun. And tasty.

If I had a penny every time someone gave me their dog to look after, I'd have a pound.

Voting Lib Dems because you're angry at the other two parties is like sawing your balls off because your jeans are too tight.

5 WORD NEWS REPORTS

NO NEWS IS GOOD NEWS


Love and Thai Sweet Chicken
Jc

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